30 things I've learnt from 5 years being published: no 7 – being on submission never gets any easier
September 6 2023 marks 5 years since my first novel was released 😲
I’ve now published 6, and have 2 more under contract.
To celebrate, I’m sharing a new post about what I’ve learnt from being published EVERY DAY throughout the month. This post is part of that series!
Click here for the rest →
I’m not sure there’s much more I can add to the title of this post.
In fact, I’m quite tempted to just leave it there.
But I’ll elaborate anyway (I do so love the sound of my own voice 😆)
You may have been on submission to publishers yourself, in which case I’d suggest skipping this post unless you want to be reminded of the absolute pain and agony of that hideous process.
If not, then stay tuned…
I’ve been on submission to publishers four times now. Twice before I got my first book deal (both times I failed to secure a publisher), then again with my third book which became my debut.
Then again with my pen-name book.
I’m not counting being on submission to my existing publisher with my ‘option’ books as this is slightly different. Still very nervewracking but not to anywhere near the same extent, as you know that there’s always room for further conversation if they do turn down your proposal.
Going on submission with my pen-name book was definitely the worst. I’m not sure why. I think because my agent was quite excited about its chances, and so was the foreign rights agent.
So we all had that thing which you MUST NOT HAVE in publishing: High Hopes.
I’ve since also learnt that High Hopes are the cause of most misery when it comes to this career.
Keeping your expectations lower than low is a safer bet (I know this might sound a bit negative, but I am a Capricorn and I’m trying to safeguard your mental health).
Anyway, the irony is that when The One That Got Away went out to publishers, it actually didn’t really matter too much whether or not it got picked up, because I still had my existing deal with my suspense publisher.
But perhaps because that book meant so much to me, and because my agent was so enthusiastic about it, I really did hope that it might catch someone’s attention.
The two weeks it was on submission were absolutely the worst two weeks of my life. I was very lucky in that I’d heard my UK editor wanted to buy it after just a few days, but we were still waiting to hear back from all the other publishers, and somehow being in that dreadful limbo was just the worst.
Like I had a book deal, but we hadn’t accepted it yet, and I couldn’t tell anyone?
I know I should have been grateful to have had one offer on the table, but the nature of a writer’s brain is that once you achieve one thing, your goalposts immediately shift and you suddenly want an auction and a bidding war and you start to do that stupid superlead-title dreaming thing I’ve mentioned before.
Also, I don’t mind telling you that the offer we’d had was pretty standard. Not bad, but certainly not enough to change my life.
So I was hoping, hoping, hoping, hoping that another editor would come in and offer so that we could have a bit of an auction and try to get the money up. We had two editors who were very keen and we really did think maybe they would offer.
But they didn’t.
And although, like I said, I was so happy to have one offer on the table, I still couldn’t help feeling a little bit disappointed.
Feel free to swear at me here!
I probably would too. I know I sound like an ungrateful brat, but the truth is that when the possibility of MORE is dangled in front of you, it’s natural to feel a little down when it’s taken away.
Anyway, I got over it. As you do. We agreed the UK deal and I was excited to work with my lovely new editor, who had been so enthusiastic and really seemed to understand the book.
But then my book went out on submission in America. This time, I had NO HOPES. Literally none. I’d been on submission in America with most of my suspense books before and only one of them had secured a deal, and that was with a teeny-tiny independent publisher.
But then something bizarre happened!
Via my US agent, I was sent some questions about the book from one of the Big Editors at a Big Publisher.
I replied as best I could, hardly daring to get my hopes up, telling myself it didn’t MEAN ANYTHING.
And then when I woke up the next day I had a pre-empt from her in my Inbox.
I burst into tears and called my mum, who thought something terrible had happened.
Those three weeks were the most intense and stressful three weeks of my life. Although it had the happiest of endings and I know how lucky I am, it genuinely made me ill.
I thought a lot about what makes being on submission so brutal, and I think it’s the fact that at any moment, your life could literally change inconceivably.
But while you wait for news, you are stuck in this strange limbo-hell, and there’s nothing you can do but try your hardest to distract yourself.
I’m really gutted that even after years of being published I haven’t found a way to make this process any more bearable.
If anyone has any tips - please let me know. Genuinely!
And if anyone reading this is on submission at the moment then please know that I’m thinking of you, and I hope that life-changing email comes soon and ends your torment ❤️
